Chiefs 30, Texans 0
The Chiefs had all the points they needed just seconds into the game after Knile Davis brought back the opening kickoff 106 yards for a touchdown. They added more, though, including 67 yards and a score from Spencer Ware (16-67-1), who took the lion’s share of the backfield work while Charcandrick West (8-26, 1-9 receiving) played second fiddle. Houston got a solid game on the ground from Alfred Blue (17-99), but five giveaways sealed their postseason fate.
Extra points: Even before Jeremy Maclin (3-29) was helped off with an injury the Chiefs’ passing game was funneling through Travis Kelce (8-128). Where was that all year? Alex Smith (17-22-190-1-1, 5-27 rushing) was efficient while his Texans’ counterpart Brian Hoyer (15-34-136-0-4) was the polar opposite. Even feeding DeAndre Hopkins (6-69) proved fruitless, and no other Texan caught more than three balls or topped 30 yards.
Steelers 18, Bengals 16
In a game that put the “wild” in Wildcard Weekend, these AFC North rivals combined to give back more than a third of their net yards via penalties. And there wasn’t much in the way of yardage to begin with, as Steelers kicker Chris Boswell’s four field goals paced the game’s scoring.
Extra points: The Bengals can’t blame Andy Dalton for this one, but it wasn’t really the fault of AJ McCarron (23-41-212-1-1, 5-9 rushing) either. Cincy’s one-two backfield punch came up soft, with Jeremy Hill (12-50-1, 3-27 receiving) coughing up a killer fumble when Cincy has all but salted the game away and Giovani Bernard (6-28, 2-2 receiving) never getting going. The Steelers more than survived without the injured DeAngelo Williams, as Jordan Todman (11-65) and Fitzgerald Toussaint (17-58, 4-60 receiving) picked up the slack. Ben Roethlisberger (18-31-229-1) took a beating, but he still managed to feed Antonio Brown (7-119) his usual serving.
Seahawks 10, Vikings 9
The team’s combined yardage barely climbed above 400, the temperature never climbed above zero, and a game with only one touchdown was decided by a chip shot field goal attempt pulled horribly left. If you were looking for the opposite of fantasy, this was your kind of nightmare.
Extra points: Filling in for Marshawn Lynch, who stayed home after practicing all week because he didn’t feel right, Christine Michael (21-70, 1-14 receiving) was the only player to amass more than 60 yards on his own. While his yardage may not have been as great, two catches by Doug Baldwin (5-42-1) netted a key first down and the game’s only touchdown. The Seattle defense once again bottled up Adrian Peterson (23-45, 2-13 receiving); worse, Peterson committed yet another critical postseason fumble every bit as tarnishing to his legacy as his missed 2014 season.
Packers 35, Redskins 18
Finally, some points! If you loaded up for the final game of the weekend you were rewarded with—at least when compared to the rest of the slate—a veritable touchdown bonanza. After the six previous teams combined for just seven touchdowns on the weekend the Packers and Redskins nearly matched that total with six of their own.
Extra points: It still wasn’t vintage Aaron Rodgers (21-36-210-2-0), but it was the best the Packers’ offense has looked in some time. Rodgers spread the ball around, with James Jones (7-81) doing the heavy lifting while both Davante Adams (4-48-1) and Randall Cobb (3-38-1, 5-24 rushing) finding the end zone. Where the Packers truly found success was on the ground, as James Starks (12-53-1, 2-12 receiving) and Eddie Lacy (12-63-1) split the workload and both found the end zone. Kirk Cousins (29-46-329-1-0, 2-2-1 rushing) put up likable fantasy numbers while leaning heavily on Jordan Reed (9-120-1), who will be a top-five fantasy tight end next August. He also fed pass-catching back Chris Thompson (1-25 rushing, 8-89 receiving), who will likely fly under the radar heading into next season but could be a low-cost savior for PPR league backfields